FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: !
Proud of your body? That is your excuse? Okay, so let's say I did check you out, which I am not admitting too. But let's say I did.. does that mean you've been secretly enjoying it? I think it does.
I see the word 'proud', in this insistence,as a code for 'please Clark check me out some more'. And now that I rarely see you, which by the way I am enjoying. You've been deprived of the attention. Is this the real reason you wish to know about my imaginary porn stash?
Clark
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: You alive?
You suddenly have gone very quiet. My last email was just a joke Lois. .. You gonna come visit this weekend? Chloe mentioned it. See you then if you do.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: You alive?
Smallville,
You are way to sensitive. I've been really busy which is why I didn't respond.
And please don't go and get a big head. You checking me out, which you have, is not anything more then an occasional annoyance. You're like a fly I swat at, nothing more.
Yes, I am coming down on Friday after my classes. Please tell me you are going to be busy with farm chores or spying on Lana.
BTW Clarkie that stash is no where near imaginary. You and I both know it..
I bet its stuffed at the bottom of one of those chests you have up in
the loft. Probably under a stack of sports mags and school papers. - Lois
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: Re: You alive?
Busy? Sure Lois, I recall Chloe saying that you've skipped a few classes. So what are you doing with your time that takes you away from both responding to your email and showing up for class?
And I am not going to be spying on Lana. We're not together and I'm to busy with football practice, unlike some. Lois, please leave off the porn stash. It doesn't exist and stay out of the chests in the barn, they are private.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Touchy!
I skipped class ONE day..one day and Chloe is making it sound like a regular occurrence. If you must know it had to do with women stuff.. It was painful and well gory to be honest. I bet that makes you blush doesn't it? Aww.. Poor Smallville. So innocent, to afraid to look at his hidden err sorry 'private' porn or deal with grown up matters. The world doesn't revolve around footballs and Lana you know.
You know what I think? I think you missed me emailing you. Couldn't go more then a few days without hearing from little me. Well now don't worry there. I won't leave you again for to long Clark. Lois will save you from your life of stalking and farm chores.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: no subject
I have taken biology and sex education, Lois. I'm not convinced that was your only time or reason to miss a class. Its not how Chloe worded it. Of course she didn't mention the 'women stuff' but it was implied more then once that you skipped.
I don't stalk, Lois, nor do I need you to save me from anything. You didn't email me back because you do like me checking you out. Its why you can't give a straight answer on skipping classes.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: so...
Did you just admit to checking me out? I knew it!! You do, and wow I can only congratulate you on being part of the normal species of men. Give you a few years and you might even learn to woo a girl and get a little farm of your own or at the rate you're going you might have perfected those so called non existent stalker skills.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: so...
I didn't admit to it. You are taking it out of context and you know it. The point was you miss the idea that I do and that is why you can't let go of the porn issue or anything else you've been obsessing about over me
I don't need your help to 'woo' anyone. However, Lois, I'd be happy to help you with the basics of showing up for class. I know you had the difficulty attending classes at Smallville High, I can only imagine how hard it is there at college.
**
FROM: Lois Lane
TO:chloetorch @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: What did you say?!
Chloe,
What did you say to Clark? He seems to think I've been doing major class ditching. Why did you even say anything? What happened to the trust between cousins?
I love you but I am so making you pay for this when I come down this weekend.
- Lois
FROM: Chloe Sullivan
TO:isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: What did you say?
Lois,
I didn't say anything. Not like you think I did. I think Clark must have over heard the phone conversation we had last Thursday. When I got off the phone he did ask who I was talking to and now I understand the smirking he was doing. Lois I am so sorry, I shall be more careful when around him. What does he know?
Love, Chloe
FROM: Lois Lane
TO:chloetorch @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: Re: What did you say?
Just that I missed some classes and I gave him a line on it being about women's stuff which is partially true. He is hounding me! I knew the innocent face he pulls was a lie. Some how I am gonna make him pay for this.
Be more careful Chloe!
Love from your frustrated Cousin,
Lois
FROM: Chloe Sullivan
TO:isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: Re: Re: What did you say?
He's been looking mighty pleased with himself. I do have to wonder, Lois if there is more to this then you finding it 'frustrating' on his eavesdropping. Is there something else you're not telling me?
FROM: Lois Lane
TO:chloetorch @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: no
Why would there be anything else? The plaid man is just getting on my last nerves as he usually does. Nothing else.
FROM: Chloe Sullivan
TO:isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: no
Okay Cuz, if you say so. Well I know you are more then capable of dealing with him, just leave him in one piece will ya. He is my best friend.
**
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: Re: so..
I didn't
admit to it. You are taking it out of context and you know it. The
point was you miss the idea that I do and that is why you can't let go
of the porn issue or anything else you've been obsessing about over me
I don't know need your help to 'woo' anyone. However, Lois, I'd be happy to help you with the basics of showing up for class. I know you had the difficulty attending classes at Smallville High, I can only imagine how hard it is there at college.
I don't know need your help to 'woo' anyone. However, Lois, I'd be happy to help you with the basics of showing up for class. I know you had the difficulty attending classes at Smallville High, I can only imagine how hard it is there at college.
Personally, I think you don't want to admit to needing help to 'woo' because you know you couldn't handle the lessons of Professor Lane. I am just to hot to handle. I shouldn’t have offered really, it would probably scar your innocent farm boy naiveties to learn what women really want.
Which by the way isn't stalking or eavesdropping.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: ?
What do you mean eavesdropping? And I don't stalk.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd @thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Re: ?
Oh lets just say my investigating skills came into play Smallville. Did you really think I wouldn't ask Chloe about what she apparently said about me skipping classes?
It turns out you not only like to watch neighbor girls through your telescope but enjoy listening on phone calls. Maybe your not as innocent as you look.
In that case, this weekend, expect some lessons. Attendance is mandatory.
- Professor Lois Lane
P.S. There is no where you can run.
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