Also I guess i am keeping the current title. Thanks to all who voted!
Self beta'd as usual and probably extra worse then normal as I am really sick.
Season 4 Continues...
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Go Smallville!
Well..well..well Smallville I heard about the 'attempt' you made. I wish I had of been there to see it so I'd know how to grade you. I guess I'll just have to do so based on what I was told. Oh Man you have no idea how happy you've made me Smallville!
Professor Lois
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: Go Smallville!
What? What attempt are you talking about? Grade me?
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: Go Smallville!
The flirting you did at the talon with someone other then Lana. I've been told you practically fell all over yourself talking to her.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: what?
What?..no Lois, first off I tripped. Second I wasn't flirting!! and who told you?
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: what?
You don't have to be shy about it Farmerella. I am real proud that you made the attempt though from the story I am told I'm going to have to give you a C+. Just because you failed to communicate properly. Apparently you drooled a bit too.. not so good for the image you were trying to portray.
FROM: ClarkKent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: what?
??? Lois, I think you are making this up. I said Hi to a girl I bumped into, then slipped on the wet floor I think, not exactly sure what made me fall over but it was definitely not me trying to flirt. I can just fine you know. Also I didn't drool!
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: re: what?
According to my source (who isn't Chloe) you more then said Hi. Then suddenly went a little green around the gills and fell all over yourself, apologizing the whole time. What I would have paid to have seen this. I've also heard that you've had this fumbling and tripping issue before when around girls you like.. doesn't seem so far fetched to me now.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: re: re: what?
I don't know who your 'source' is but they don't know what they are talking about. Give it up Lois, I'm never going to practice your lesson. Period.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: re: re: re: what?
Oh I don't know. I am sure with the right incentive we can get you to practice it one more time. Besides this is for your own good, Lana has moved on to other pastures and you..you need to broaden your horizons. Try out one of the other flavors out there.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: re: re: re: re: what?
I was never practicing in the first place and flavors? What are we talking about? Ice cream?
Look I'm fine, I don't need to try anything out. Give it a rest Lois.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: The denial king strikes again..
Its not my fault you tried and failed, so don't blame me. Denying it won't do you any good Smallville, you bombed on that one and now its time to own up to it. Give what a rest? You owe me!
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: The denial king strikes again..
Again, I didn't even try. I just said Hi and tripped. Why am I even discussing this with you? You lost the silent challenge Lois and I don't have to do the assignment. Nothing you say is going to make it happen and how do you figure I owe you?
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: The denial king strikes again..
Do I really need to list why you owe me? You're a guy that right there is enough. And you have to do this assignment! Smallville, its for your own good. What kind of person would I be if let you become a full on stalker when I could have stopped it?
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: re: The denial king strikes again..
A list? Lois if anyone should be making a list on transgressions its me. I know it was you who took the last cookies that was marked for ME. And I DON'T STALK!
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Aww..cookies
Those cookies did not have your name on them and it wasn't my fault the little sticky note got lost. Jeesh Smallville.. are you channeling your inner two year old or what? And yes you do stalk. I am sure you give it another name in your mind but you do.
I've got a new nickname for you. How about we call you Farmer Stalkie McClarkie. Actually you have no choice in the matter as I quite like it.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: Aww..cookies
You call me that and I'll show up at your dorm with a lesson on how to improve class attendance.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Stalkie McClarkie
Oh wow, I'm so scared of Stalkie McClarkie. What's he going to do to me? Show up and look dumb? That won't take any effort.
You don't know where my dorm room is anyway. But wait..that means you'll have to put your stalker skills into effect and prove my point!
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: Stalkie McClarkie
Don't think I won't do it Lois! I'll even wear my most worn out plaid and shredded jeans and that straw hat you despise in the barn. I'll tell people I'm looking for my girlfriend Lois Lane.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: Stalkie McClarkie
You don't have the balls to do it! Stalkie McClarkie..Stalkie McClarkie
StalkieMcClarkie Stalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkieStalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkie StalkieMcClarkie Stalkie McClarkie StalkieMcClarkie Stalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkie Stalkie McClarkie!
Use to it yet?
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: re: Stalkie McClarkie
Wanna bet? How about a taste..you've been itching to see my bad side.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Dead man emailing
OH that is not funny! How in the world am I suppose to explain that phone call? You are so dead Clark!
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: Dead man emailing
Real mature Lois! Thankfully I’ve learned to check emails with pictures in them from you at home. What are those pictures suppose to mean anyway? The one is almost pornographic Lois!
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: Dead man emailing
Pornographic? I could do much worse if you really wanted and what do you think it means Clark? Do I need to spell it out for you? S.T.I.C.K Y.O.U.R H.E.A.D U.P Y.O.U.R A.S.S.. get it now? Do anything else like that again and I'll repay the phone call favor.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: re: Dead man emailing
I wouldn't have had to call if you had just taken me seriously, don't call me Stalkie McClarkie and I won't have to do anything else.
Oh and Lois.. nice to see you can spell. Now just take that skill and use it to click the little abc icon. Its how the rest of us spell check. Might save you loads of trouble. Might even get a higher mark on your assignments.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: Tight Ass
What bit you Smallville? The mean bug?.. low man. Real low.. That's fine, because atleast when I got to bed at night I don't need an Elmer Fudd night light to keep me feeling safe. I wonder what Lana or Chloe would think if I told them about your stuffed bugs bunny. Did it make you feel safe and sound? Didn't think I knew about that one did you?
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: Tight Ass
Its called having childhood memories, Lois. Atleast I had a stuffed animal..what did you have a cuddly tank? Maybe a bazooka? Nothing says childhood like a stuffed version of a deadly weapon.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: Tight Ass
I'm impressed Smallville you give as good as you get. Do your ma and paknow you have this mean streak? Now I have a busy week ahead so don't think we're finished with this. Though perhaps when we do talk again you'll be over your man period.
Oh and the cookies.. yum..you're mom really knows how to work the fudge. Soft and gooey..melt in your mouth. MmmMmm. Gotta say when I think about it I can understand your grief over those cookies.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: How are you?
Lois you alright? You were a little unnaturally quiet when I dropped off from the hospital.
Just wanted to make sure.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: How are you?
So you wanted me to talk your ear off? I thought considering you saved me it was my way of saying thanks. You by the way have impecable timing. Which is amazing within itself considering how flaky you can be.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT:re:re: How are you?
You're welcome Lois, I'm glad you're okay and what do you mean flaky?
And it's spelled impeccable Lois.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT:Flaky Kent
Clark sometimes you just disappear into thin air, or like not show up. I don't even hang with you all that much and I see it. I once thought Chloe was exaggerating but you really are that flaky. Of course Chloe didn't call it that, but she is too nice.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: Flaky Kent
The only one exaggerating anything is you and technically you don't 'hang' with me at all.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: Flaky Kent
This be true. I don't 'hang' with you..I grace you with my presence. You are so blessed Smallville.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: re: Flaky Kent
right..Lois, if you truly wanted to bless me you wouldn't sit in the barn and critique how I do farm chores. The best thanks you could give me is to show up for your classes, graduate and move far away.
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: no subject
You can't get rid of me that easily Clarkie. Besides one day you'll miss me when I am gone.
FROM: Clark Kent
TO: isthisloveCoverdale@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re :no subject
I highly doubt I'll miss you bossing me around and giving your opinion of everything under the sun.
Stop calling me Clarkie, Lois!
FROM: Lois Lane
TO: Elmerfudd@thedigitalwave.com
SUBJECT: re: re: no subject
Smallville, one day I will be gone and who will be there to liven up your life? No you'll miss me. Mark my words.. You'd be half a man without me ifI ever left, eventually you'd wither away and die.
Though if I left now it would be like..half a boy wouldn't it?
P.S. You're right about the thank you. So next time I drop by I'll give you my own special thanks in person.
I could do with some of my own Martha Kent cookies right about now but I'll take the feedback sort 
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